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Wednesday, March 31, 2010

You must know when being united is not best!



The American way of life has been secured by and with the ability of persons to oppose an opinion of another person. Often issues are so substantial that one manner of attack is easily repelled and the issue at hand gains measurable strength. There are many ways to attack certain ills of our society and not all of us are equipped to fight in the same manner. I am one who believes in an orchestrated military surgical attack……if called for.

The issues with the state of Black America offer no such call for said attack. We have so many problems in their manifestations and varying degrees of understanding that we need ideas from every front.Our great history tells us that we don’t all have to think alike to show progress. Case and point: In learning more about W.E.B. DuBois and Booker T. Washington, I understand that one simple solution for such sorrowed people fits not!

These two gentlemen giants were often not in agreement on ways to improve the lives of their fellow African-American. This was wonderful in that it fostered needed debate about

1. Moving toward industrial education and receiving acceptance slowly by white America almost through osmosis.(BTW)

OR

2. The duty of the Negro to DEMAND voting rights, equality, and the education of Negro youth according to their ability with a greater value on the study of liberal arts.(WD)

Mr. DuBois was quite radical in his ideas at the time and Mr. Washington was anointed “black leader” my white America since his philosophy was non threatening and told us to be patient until they accepted us. I don’t find any of these to be particularly offensive as, in my humble opinion, there was a need for both. This need probably was different regionally (South/North). This is to say that Black America was and is in such a bad way that we needed and need help in more than one way. We need leadership in more than one way. We need black liberal and we need black conservatives. Malcolm or Martin? Both!

These different manners in attacking the same issues that befall our community are relevant to differing segments of our society.We weren’t all called to be soldiers in the form of Malcolm and we weren’t all meant to be as compassionate and forgiving as Martin. It is said that a young person who is a conservative lacks compassion and an older person who is a liberal lacks a brain. I don’t know any of this this to be true, but I do know that our fight is not with one another. My problem is your problem, even if we have different ways to attack it. When we all thing exactly alike we become a collective group teetering on intellectual and emotional non-growth. We don’t all have to think alike but we do have to stop fighting one another when we disagree. There are many ways to get you home…….chose one, my way may not be yours. We just need to get home!

Thursday, March 25, 2010

Men and women are both from Earth....sometimes their minds or on Venus and Mars though!


Fellas, there is no automagic prescription for making a woman happy. Because “IT” worked with one lady does not make it the gospel with them all. In conversation or in bed! Their happiness and satisfaction is something that has to be constantly worked on, modified, fixed, altered, made different, redone, refashioned, adjusted, fluxuated, transformed......(deep breath)you get what I’m saying. Even though we labor to understand them, we love them more daily. You know, can’t live with em, CAN’T live without em.

BUT!,

We DO have a problem understanding them, or we pretend to not understand them. We are hardwired to do things in a manly fashion. We are literal creatures prone to expect the same from others. We can’t read minds, we are criminally blatant with things that we may need to water down a little more, and for the most part, we are not emotional (except for the punks that are stalkers and drama-kings that attack everyone over “my woman”). This is a problem to her.

Ladies, more attention to what REALLY makes us happy would immediately decrease breakups and divorces exponentially in the world. We marry you hoping that you stay the same, and you don’t. You marry us hoping that we change, and we don’t. What made me happy will make me happy...JUST KEEP IT UP. It also helps to stay in your lane. Where that is will be determined by your relationship. If you wear the pants in your relationship, always do so. If he does, let him! Some men like an assertive woman that takes the household leadership by the reigns. Hey, if that is how you do it, fine. Just don’t retard the relationship by conveniently stepping out of your designed place when it fits you.

Ladies, more understanding is needed. Don’t ignore the things life tells you when you are dating. This is your precursor to the marriage or your lifelong commitment. Stop trying to make a man a mouse, a mouse into a man. He is what he is. You gotta love him or leave him alone. YOU CANNOT FIX A MAN WHO IS MADE ALREADY BY HIS MOTHER, or father. Find out just what makes that man happy and figure out if you can REALLY do just that, whatever it may be. If you can’t and you continue in the relationship, eventually someone else will.

Fella, more understanding is needed. First you have to understand that she is smarter, sneakier, more conniving, more convincing, and more loving that you can ever be or imagine to be. Those of us that understand this are better off than those that don’t. You can not beat her at any of your games! Make sure you are honest with her and see if she likes the REAL you, because sooner or later she will meet him. Tiger Woods know knows this. Let her play her part and you play yours. Be THE man instead of a man, some of you understand that and some will never understand that. Marry her knowing that she will change and you have to adapt to it. This is not rocket science. Many people make life harder than it has to be by simply avoiding critical thought. Life really shouldn’t be so rough!

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Everything aint for everybody



In an attempt to “look better”, some sisters are doing a wonderful job. Hair extension, long nails, eyelashes, and even the high heels that seem painful. We see you sister and you do it well. That being said, there are a variety of brothers out there for the varieties of sisters. This look is not for everyone. If you think it is for you, by all means go get it Ma.

This commentary is to let you know that you all look good and that we(brothers), are liking your look regardless of what you do……………………………………or don’t do!


There are still brothers out there that find the beauty in you just as God made you. Kinky hair, thick, luscious lips, firm…ahem! Well you get my meaning. There are still brothers that are looking for sisters without the lacefronts or the extensions. This is not to say that you ladies don’t look good with them, it is just a reminder that you were BEAUTIFUL before these items of change as well. There are brothers that like all of it. I always enjoyed the fact that sisters come in all shapes, sizes, and variations of philosophy and thought. You go girl with your Herm├Ęs “Birkin” bag, Manolo Blahnik shoes, riding around in your Lamborghini Reventon. You look marvelous. So do you baby girl in the Nine West pumps, Guess bag, and the Toyota Camry. We can’t forget the girl in the Birkinstocks, dreads with cowrie shells driving around her Prius and rocking the red, green and black hemp bag. As well, we love you mommie in the old skewl Lac, smacking gum with the smell of “Spritz” illuminating from your beautiful crown.

The point is there needs to be more love of the various manner in which sisters express themselves through their individual styles. I LOVE YOU ALL! Shouldn’t you all love one another?

The next time you think that you don’t like her style, her vibe, her hair, her shoes, or just HER, think about what you would look like if ALL sisters rocked your look. Stand out girl and be proud of who you are. There is someone who loves the way you look as well as the way she looks. I like it all!

A friend once told me that there was no place in the military or on the police force for a black man. I calmly replied, “Do you really think that the military or the police would be better if we were not there?” He had no rebuttal. I say to you, “Do you really think the world would be better if there was no variety in sisters? Do you REALLY think that the world would be better if we were all Democrats? Variety is what spices our lives. Be you baby girl and that Prince that loves it will find and love you! Your style and flash makes this world a better place……especially for the different varieties of brothers!

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Should you listen to a sinner? Is the message the same no matter whose mouth it comes from?



Should you listen to a sinner? Is the message the same no matter whose mouth it comes from?

Academically, socially, and religiously the answer should always be yes. This is if the message comes from a firm foundation of studied truth. Because a person is a sinner, a fool, or unlearned in the manner of a structured education does not make their message less palatable or even more erroneous. Recently, people have been putting much stock into their “leaders” and the actions that these so called leaders take on a personal level. None of us are perfect and we all fall short of …….well, if you were raised like me you know the rest.

Because a Pastor has cheated on his wife, is his biblical message about adultery inaccurate? Not so if it is grounded in the principles of your beliefs. The faith should not be put into the Pastor but into the message that comes from a higher power. If one studies this message for themselves they understand that the imperfect vessel carrying the message is to be ignored and that study would show that the message is still the same.

Because none of us a perfect and we WILL all fall to some form of temptation and/or sin, we must be very aware of the messages and less aware of the messenger. Many great men in history have been less than stellar in their personal actions. MLK, Tupac, King David, Jim Morrison, and probably your pastor, shaman, priest, imam, or spiritual leader (trying to cover a broad audience). In each case, these men still spoke messages of truth. Again, educating yourself on their messages would prove this to each individual. By the way, I wonder what people would think of your message if we shined a light into your affairs.

I leave the judgments’ to a higher power and keep it moving with the message. I know that I must forgive people for their indiscretions. I will need the same. I am full of imperfections and faults. I thank God that most of you pray for me instead of ridiculing me and am even more thankful that you don’t shine your bright lights in my direction, ohh am I glad of this…….I am still a work in progress, pray for ya boy.
Leave the expectations of holiness in man outside of what you perceive as reality. Acknowledge the fact that ALL men will make mistakes, some horrendous. Be willing to find the good in that person and be even more knowledgeable about what not to follow in that person. Pray without ceasing for the individual and recognize when they are being used by a higher power, even with their sins. God never said that he would only use saints.

Many people are now making excuses to not congregate because of individual human wrong doing and ignoring why they SHOULD congregate. Study to show thyself…….there I go again. It pains me to see people miss out on blessings because they say that the congregating place is full of sinners. Where else do you want them to be? My life is full of sin, so I try to beat the door in on Sunday mornings…….I need it! Why do you really not believe that you need to be in the company of those that believe as you? There is immeasurable power in that group, I promise. Have you really put so much stock into man that he can run you away, or, have you put so little stock in the higher power that HE cannot get you back? Think about it while the blood is still……....sorry, don’t mean to proselytize. I just can’t help myself.

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Is it a tree or is it a miracle


My Dad once had my brother and I look at a piece of wood all day long. Why? He did it because he wanted us to see inside of our own minds.

The story goes like this. One summer morning on our way out the house to play he stopped us and placed a piece of wood on the dresser in our shared room. He then told us, “If you can tell me what you see, I will let you go outside and play.” Immediately, I told him that I see a piece of wood. At that, he denied our entry to the outside world of friends and leisure.

He then told us that he would be back every hour to see if what we would see had changed. Every hour on the hour we went through this frustrating drill of telling him we see a piece of wood, failing to understand what he did not see. We were visibly upset every time he came into the room and longed for our mother, who was at work, to save us from this encounter with the “sensei”.

There was no relief all day as the drill continued. All day long we continued. About the time that the sun was beginning to go down my father came into the room and started to teach. He went into the long spill that every father goes into when he is attempting to teach his little cubs something about life and then he told us how wrong we were. He continued by sharing with us what it was that he saw.

He told us that he saw a seed that became a tree; he saw the plant that became a tree that became the home of various forest creatures. He saw the leaves that came from the tree that nourished insects; he saw the tree that provided shade for humans and animals alike. He saw a table that was made from the tree along with fire wood for warmth. He saw paper that came from the tree and materials to build a home. He expressed the years that passed to make the tree something to be respected and not taken for granted. He talked about the space that the tree occupied and its inevitable reuse by nature.

My brother and I never saw things in the world in the perspective we had previous to this encounter. We stated looking at what things were, what they are, and what they could possibly be. We really started to begin to attempt to see the entire picture as it concerns all things. I, personally, started to realize that simple things were too often taken for granted and that we ignored, too often, the many miracles around us. To this day, I believe, that was one of my greatest days in school…………………EVER!

Friday, March 5, 2010

I’m not crazy. I am the only one in the world with sense, everyone else is crazy.

I’m not crazy. I am the only one in the world with sense, everyone else is crazy.

My title speaks of the thought of intelligent ignorance. Have you ever met someone who just doesn’t get it? You know those people that continue to do things the “crazy” way and promise you that their breakthrough is just around the next bend. Sometimes they are in your family, sometimes they are your associates and sometimes this person is you.


There is definitely a very fragile and thin line between insanity and genius; sometimes they are married as one. The hurdle to cross is finding out where you are positioned along that line. Many people will not get this to their collective psyches right away, but, they will get it sooner or later. This is if God blesses them with enough years. To be insane enough to keep trying it the same way and expecting a different result is just genius…….to a den of fools that is! At some point, preferably at a point when there is still some youth to be lived, a renaissance of though should take place to shake a person completely and help them with the adjustment from fool to student.

You see the mistakes we make are made to educate, not to push us into a continuous cycle of the EXACT SAME MOTION of error. When you get to the point that you believe that we are all crazy and you are the only one in the world with the good sense, you are either incredibly foolish or you are a brilliant thinker. Be very wise and cautious in making a decision as to which you are, it will usually be life altering, life directing or in dire straits life ending, philosophically of course, one hopes. When at the end of the rope tie a knot and ask for help. You cannot do ALL things alone. Think seriously and patiently about your next move and be informed of ALL of the possibilities. If the worst that is possible is more than you can handle, consider that in depth. If we all are crazy and you are the one that God gifted with the good sense……USE IT!.............................PLEASE!

When you find that traditional methodology is diametrically opposed to an action that causes you heartache, you are probably wrong in your action. Please recognize that the world does not revolve around you and that it will continue to spin upon its axis with no consideration of your drama. The rest of us crazy folk will eventually let you keep bumping your head until you realize it hurts. That is as long as it doesn’t interfere with our lives. Good Luck to you old sensible one.

Thursday, March 4, 2010

Those that don’t sow will not reap!

Many times charity is abused and misused to create people that are dependent on you. This is very good for politicians as the people that can be made to be dependent on them can be a source of votes that create a prosperous political life. When you are dependent on this government you become a subject and run quickly away from being a citizen with inalienable rights that were granted by the Creator.

The question is this: Do we learn to fish or do we wait for someone(politician) to bring it to our table. If we do this, what happens when they decide to take the fish away? Do we give up some God-given rights for some measure of a little security? What do you think of Ben Franklin's quote "Those who would sacrifice freedom for security deserve neither"

I was, at times, a welfare child growing up. Luckily for me, my parents made me understand that welfare was a temporary means to give you an opportunity to prosper to the point where you needed it no more. My Mom would say,” You can’t stay on it forever, someone else may need it.” I focused highly on these words as a child.

I also knew that if I planted ONE seed in GOOD soil I usually got many fruit. I will repeat and add, ONE seed, MANY fruit; NO seed, NO fruit! I wish more people acted upon the knowledge and teachings that tell them that you will get noting out of it if you put nothing in it. It is not true that you get out what you put in. It is true that you get MUCH MORE out of something than you put in, ask any farmer.


More children (and some adults) need to be taught that the hard work of sowing seed into a field means you get to eat (prosper) in the future. Too many people are looking for something without putting anything into it. If you are today, a person that is giving NOTHING and expecting SOMETHING, I challenge you today to find a way to add to your worldly worth by making a contribution to YOUR society. The days of the people that want the most giving the least should end. This is especially true of our centers of worship. People have many resources for party and leisure, big cars, their large homes, their guilty pleasures, their spoiled rotten children and give $2.00 every week in church. Do you also find it thought provoking that these are the people that want the most (resources) from the church?

You should sow in many fields so that you can reap in many fields. This is the recipe for generations of prosperity. Invest your time and resources, donate valuable time and money, educate someone, learn more, plant something, exercise often, work tirelessly, be a part of something that is larger that yourself, and acknowledge where your blessings come from by putting something back to bless someone else. The benefits will be more than your basket, shaken and stirred, can hold! This I promise from my own experiences.

Monday, March 1, 2010

I did it ALONE....NOT!!

I take credit for none of the good that has happened in my life, because of my life, or to my life. I fully understand that EVERYTHING I was able to do, am able to do, and will be able to do is on the shoulders of others. I really hope that I never ever forget this. I stand on the shoulders of my parents, grandparents, preachers, teachers, friends, and mentors, friends and even my enemies (in no particular order).

None of us have been able to do a thing alone. I do know that in the turbulent years of my past I existed off of the prayers of Cloteal Gamble, Ruby Nell Gamble, George and Octavius Jackson, Phyllis Williams, my aunts, uncles, and friends. This is especially true of the times that I was too proud or ignorant to pray for myself. To this I say THANK YOU ALL!

I realize that all I have and aspire to accomplish is because someone else was not able to reach and/or pursue their goals to make sure that I was able to. I realize that not one dime was ever earned just because Trennan was able, intellectually or physically to earn it alone. This is true of many but my will to do it comes from God and those that have spent moments in thoughts about my future, my physical strength comes from God and the people that helped to nourish my physical abilities throughout the years. My intelligence comes from those that took of and from themselves to make sure that I got it, even when I did not want to get it.

I have done nothing on my own not even take a breath. This was even given to me by God through the love of my parents and I REALLY appreciate it now more than ever. This day I promise to make sure that my children know that there is nothing that is accomplished that is not accomplished on the shoulders of someone else. Thank you to the griots, ancestors, loved-ones, prayerful ones, coaches, teachers, mentors, family, friends, and to you heavenly Father for making a way for ALL of these people to enter into the path that you have created for me. Please help me to NEVER EVER forget that all that I do is done because of others!